I’m not sure why I said uncertainty….the future is very certain in all reality. God has told us through His word everything that will happen through the period of tribulation. The only thing, therefore, I can conclude is that it is not the future that is uncertain. It’s me. I am uncertain. Uncertain of whether I will rise in Christ or fall to the devil. At this point, as much as I want to rise, it is a very good chance I’ll fall instead.
The hell on earth I have endured and suffered through to survive is nothing compared to how it is in hell. The hell on earth is only a taste of the hell below. I want no part of it. None at all. I want to rejoin my family in heaven. All of my family. Especially my son who is already there waiting for my return.
I hate to use cliches but it truly is the story of the phoenix. The phoenix rises from the ashes of her former self. The important part to remember is this; it’s the phoenix herself that lights the fire that turns her to ashes for her new self to rise up. Do I have the courage to do such a thing? I’m honestly not sure. I do know for certain that the answer lies in surrender. To God and His will.
His strength shines through my weakness. Surrendering your will for His and allowing Him to guide and keep you. That is the key. Lord knows I’m trying….